Yes! The dream may be too heavy to carry at times and that’s A-ok! Our passions may not come easy but they are well worth it.
Being able to play the piano comes with it’s benefits. It has given me the ability to communicate with musicians on a much higher level than just as a vocalist.
Most of us creatives are pretty firm about the expression of our talents so in the times where I find myself surrounded by top level musicians, it pays to be able to speak their language. It gets you a few more smiles from band members.
The other benefit is being able to play at last minute gigs. Having the option of accompanying myself on the piano without needing a full band is quite good for the pocket (teehee!) and of course saves time on scheduling rehearsals.
I have been told that the term “one-woman band” sounds like I’ve got some sort of super power and call me crazy but that sounds cool so I’m totally ok with that.
With all that said, the major challenge is that wheeling around a 55kg keyboard can be quite unladylike.
Chivalry is dead when it comes to female instrumentalists and their choice of instrument. Nobody begged me to be a pianist. I did that all by myself. I hardly get anyone bending over backwards to help me out so I’ve learned how to not just wheel around this heavy beast in heels but also carry the keyboard stand on my other arm.
Have I ever thought about quitting? At precisely 3 different times in my life so far. ‘Doubt’ and ‘fear’ get the better of you from time to time but as we all know, that’s the best way to grow. Embrace it and keep pushing – or keep wheeling in my case.
So, sometimes a keyboard, a dream, gets too heavy and you feel like dropping it but you know you can’t because that’s all you’ve ever known and deep down that’s why you have done everything you can to get to this point.
No use dropping it now when you’ve started the race and already made it a good number of times round the track. The finish line is only a few minutes or days or years away. We will all get past that ribbon. All we need is a little faith and patience.
I say hold on to the dream! If you let it go, picking up the pieces may be a lot harder than you think. If I drop my keyboard, my father will skin me alive for sure. He bought it for me and carried it across continents, literally (by plane of course… but still).
Can a dream ever feel like a burden (borne with difficulty)? Sometimes! A lot of the time, being Self-Managed makes you feel like you’re cradling your dreams in your arms but can’t seem to get everyone else to see just how truly precious you absolutely feel it is.
Some challenges and some burdens need to be dealt with in particular ways. Shift your weight a little from time to time, do a balancing act if you must like those uni-cycle jugglers at the circus.
If you can carry your overweight suitcase on holiday and in some cases even pay to ensure it gets on the plane (lol), then you can endure the weight of a dream on your shoulder just a little longer.
It’s ok to look a little crazy while the struggle is real but make sure you endure the heaviness of it all because I know for a fact that it will be worth it, eventually.
[Photography: Ima Mfon | Styling/Make-up/Hair: Kaliné]